Check it, Peons: Your CNN Humiliation Compartmentalized

Tuesday, June 14, 2011


I'm no stranger to salty language. I like a liberal sprinkling of profanities in my daily discourse. I've found that a well-placed curse word can really liven up the dullest dinner party. So when I read about a children's author named Robert Sayegh, I felt an instant connection. This man was recently ejected from a plane in Detroit for dropping the F-Bomb. Now, I'm on the guy's side. He wasn't directing this F-bomb at anyone in particular. And furthermore, the fucking plane wasn't going anywhere. It was just sitting there. For a long time. And you know how fucking annoying that can be. So I can't blame the guy.

Then I started to think of possible books this children's author might want to write. So if you're reading this Robert Sayegh--you're welcome:

1. Goodnight Moon, You Fucking Cocksucker

2. The Cat In The Motherfucking Hat

3. Everyone Shits

4. Fancy Nancy Is A Skank Ass Bitch

5. Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Piece of Shit Day

6. Cloudy With A Chance of My Sweaty Balls Smacking You in Your Fat Fucking Face

7. Fuck the Bunny--He Owes Me Money

8. Curious George Wasn't So Curious After I Punched Him In The Fucking Piehole

9. Where The Wild Motherfuckers Are

10. Oh, The Places You'll Go! (After I Shove My Foot Up Your Ass)

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