Check it, Peons: Your CNN Humiliation Compartmentalized

Monday, September 10, 2007


As a Finnish-American, I'm proud to announce that the judges for the 12th Annual Air Guitar World Championships, held in Oulu, Finland, have selected a winner. But no, it wasn't a fellow Finn who won. A Japanese guy had the best moves. Ochi "Dainoji" Yosuke is the reigning champ for the second year in a row. Check out his blazin' hot performance:

Now, according to the organizers, The World Air Guitar Championships were created 12 years ago to promote peace, because you cannot hold a gun while playing air guitar.

These people need to be recognized as the modern-day Ghandis that they are.
When will they win a Nobel Peace prize for their valiant efforts?

That being said, here are my top 5 best air guitar songs:

1. Back in Black by AC/DC
2. She Sells Sanctuary by The Cult
3. Rock n' Roll by Led Zeppelin
4. Girl, You Have No Faith In Medicine by The White Stripes
5. Crosstown Traffic by Jimmy Hendrix

Conversely, here are the top 5 worst air guitar songs:

1. The Theme from "Titanic" by Celine Dion
2. Escape (The Pina Colada Song) by Rupert Holmes
3. Sailing by Christopher Cross
4. Copacabana by Barry Manilow
5. Lost in Love by Air Supply

Please feel free to add your favorites...


Anonymous said...

Anything by Kenny G

Anonymous said...

What? How can you say that the Pina Colada song isn't good air guitar material? It has the most classic '70s whomp base line...buhn-ump-bump-buhn-ump-bump
For shame!

Anonymous said...

That Pina Colada song is awful under any circumstance just because it's been done...and then done again...and again.

It's dead. Let it rest in peace, just like that tired Saturday Night Fever disco move of pointing in alternating directions. Not satire, Not funny, just tired. Let that shit sleep (eternally).