Check it, Peons: Your CNN Humiliation Compartmentalized

Monday, November 27, 2006


One of my CNN buddies related this little gem to me over gin and tonics the other night:

"When I was hired as a VJ, my starting salary was even worse than yours. $17.5 a year. I couldn't believe it. But they still expected "professional dress". This meant no jeans. The solution to this dilemma (given to every new male VJ) was quite simple. Joe Kinstle would say earnestly,

'You know, a nice pair of Dockers costs the same as a pair of jeans. They look professional and need no dry cleaning.'

I was disgusted. It was bad enough that my poverty-line salary forced me to eat chili from a can for dinner every night, but now I was mandated to look like a douchebag too.
I mean...honestly...Dockers..."

At this point my friend shuddered and took a sip of his drink. He then stared off into the distance, presumably trying his best to shake off vile memories of the mid to late 90's corporate casual uniform:
Khaki Dockers and a chambray shirt.
This ensemble was occasionally spiffed up with a whimsical tie featuring Disney characters or Jerry Garcia's artistic renderings.
Or accessorized by a silver-tipped leather belt, designed with extra length so that it swung low, a type of belt I refered to as "the donger".

My friend and I were both silent for a while, grateful for fashion's changing tide. We found peace in the fact that our eyes are no longer accosted by this type of sartorial shitpile.
But then the realization hit:

We're safe for now...but who knows what recycled fashion goods tomorrow will bring?

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