Check it, Peons: Your CNN Humiliation Compartmentalized

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

10 UPDATES YOU SHOULDN'T PUT ON FACEBOOK


I have a love/hate relationship with Facebook. I love seeing photos. I love reading wall greetings. But then someone (occasionally me) will post an update so incredibly lame that it will ruin my whole experience, and I will log off in disgust.

Top 10 Updates You Shouldn't Put on Facebook:


1. Ted should have used Preparation H.

2. Denise thinks her husband is a no good piece of shit bastard.

3. Fran is getting a pap smear today :)

4. Joyce likes to roast puppies over a spit and eat them. Yummy!

5. Denise thinks that slut Trish is a home wrecking bitch.

6. Fred embezzled $175,000 from his company. See ya in Bermuda suckers!!!!

7. Denise longs for the days when cheaters were branded with a scarlet letter.

8. Herb likes the feel of silky panties against his balls.

9. Ralph enjoys kicking short, hairy nuns on Wednesdays.

10. Denise wants her husband to know that if he thinks he and his whore are getting the house, he's an even bigger prick than she thought he was.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Doris is off to the abortion clinic!!!!!!!

Joe said...

Joe likes it in the basement with all his imaginary friends.

Hugh Hefner said...

Hugh had trouble getting it up this morning.

Cindy McCain said...

Cindy LOOOOOVES her pills!!!!

Jerome said...

Jerome says asparagus makes my pee smell funny.

Bettina L├╝scher said...

Betty has diarrhea