Check it, Peons: Your CNN Humiliation Compartmentalized

Thursday, March 19, 2009


Beavers in New Jersey could get just a little bit hairier:

TRENTON, N.J. – New Jersey is drawing the line when it comes to bikini waxing.
The state Board of Cosmetology and Hairstyling is moving toward a ban on genital waxing altogether after two women reported being injured in their quest for a smooth bikini line.
Both women were hospitalized for infections following so-called "Brazilian" bikini waxes; one of the women has filed a lawsuit, according to Jeff Lamm, a spokesman for New Jersey's Division of Consumer Affairs, which oversees the cosmetology board.
Technically, genital waxing has never been allowed — only the face, neck, abdomen, legs and arms are permitted — but because bare-it-all "Brazilians" weren't specifically banned, state regulators haven't enforced the law.

"The genital area is not part of the abdomen or legs as some might assume," Lamm said.

Okay. Let's say this ban passes...

What would a police raid on an illegal Brazilian bikini waxing salon look like?
Can you imagine the pubic pandemonium? The shrieking, the spilled wax, the customers with half-bare poon bolting out the door...
Will there be a special police squad for this type of law enforcement?

New Jersey, you've got quite a few issues to sort out before enacting this ban.


Anonymous said...

Half bare poon is the name of my new band.

Anonymous said...

I'm partial to "Pubic Pandemonium"