Check it, Peons: Your CNN Humiliation Compartmentalized

Thursday, August 06, 2009


This is an abomination!
One of Miami Beach's most high profile residents is getting the boot:
MIAMI BEACH, Fla. – A celebrity rooster and Miami Beach tourist favorite named Mr. Clucky could soon be evicted from the condo he shares with his owner.
The Miami Herald reports that a dramatic city hall plea from Mark Buckley wasn't enough to stop officials from giving city code officers authority to remove Mr. Clucky and his hen girlfriend, Wallflower.
Buckley was also ordered to pay a $50 fine for the rooster, known for perching on the handlebars of his bicycle.
Miami Beach code prohibits keeping poultry and other livestock in residential areas.
But there might still be hope for Mr. Cluckey: Buckley can ask city commissioners for an exception or appeal to the courts.
Mr. Clucky has become a favorite subject of tourist photos and was even grand marshal of a parade.

My theory is that this is what happens when Florida is overrun by bored, fun-crushing members of the Homeowners Association. Bunch of sour pusses.
My Mom and I have long been suspicious of these elected killjoys, and have more than once defied their "No Horseplay" warnings at the pool.

These dull Association bastards are not real Floridians. Florida is the Potluck State--land of pirates, booze smugglers, leathery divorcees in leopard print bikinis, cocaine cowboys, free-wheelin' grannies and night club lotharios. It's populated by wacky Carl Haaisen characters.

As such, Mr. Clucky is a Floridian original, and deserves respect. According to his website, Mr. Clucky believes in "peace, protecting the earth and being kind to animals."

He's a goodwill ambassador. He's Cock of the Miami Beach Walk.

Save Mr. Clucky!

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